Divorce, remarriage and your church

[Valerie]

I can’t honestly say I know how our church handles divorce & remarriage. I’ve not heard how they interpret each passage. Since we’ve been attending I know in a members meeting on a Sunday evening, a member was excommunicated (but he was not there for it) & I understand it had to do with his marriage. I’d never been to a church that formerly practiced that.

What I’d like to know is if they would marry a divorced person. Decades ago we belonged to a church that practiced or interpreted the. “Exception clause “ allowing for remarriage, so under certain situations remarriage was allowed & they based that on Scripture (interpretation).

So it is true that churches can say they are following exactly what Jesus and Apostles taught yet arrive at different understandings, therefore practice.

[eccentric_rambler]

Does your church have a detailed theology on the marriage and divorce verses? I’m interested in how your church understands them to expand my own understanding.

Yes, the typical modern conservative anabaptist view, that remarriage after divorce is never permitted, whether or not either party has been unfaithful.

We use the KJV and NKJV translations which possibly influences our interpretation. Our interpretation is pretty much marriage for life, only adultery ends the marriage but does not mean remarriage is allowed unless one of the spouses dies.

I think you are the first Baptist I have heard say remarriage is never allowed. Do you have a written statement of faith that spells that out? Perhaps it's on your church's website and I can read it there?

[JohnL]

Does your church have a detailed theology on the marriage and divorce verses? I’m interested in how your church understands them to expand my own understanding.

Yes, the typical modern conservative anabaptist view, that remarriage after divorce is never permitted, whether or not either party has been unfaithful.

We use the KJV and NKJV translations which possibly influences our interpretation. Our interpretation is pretty much marriage for life, only adultery ends the marriage but does not mean remarriage is allowed unless one of the spouses dies.

I think you are the first Baptist I have heard say remarriage is never allowed. Do you have a written statement of faith that spells that out? Perhaps it's on your church's website and I can read it there?

Our little church isn’t part of the bigger Baptist conferences. We’re independent Free Will Baptists so we don’t always follow the exact same doctrines as the big guys. In our case we’re very small. We don’t even have a Facebook page much less a fancy website. LOL.

[eccentric_rambler]

But that didn't answer my question. Do you have a written statement of faith that spells out that position on divorce and remarriage? If so, could you email it to me?

[JohnH]

We use the KJV and NKJV translations which possibly influences our interpretation. Our interpretation is pretty much marriage for life, only adultery ends the marriage but does not mean remarriage is allowed unless one of the spouses dies.

That's interesting; I'm not aware of any other Freewill Baptist churches that do this. Is this unique to your specific congregation? Would you allow a visitor to take communion or to transfer their membership who might be divorced and remarried?

[ohio jones]

Why don’t we start with what your church teaches?

I've hidden a couple of responses and will restore them after this question is answered.

We follow the Bible regarding marriage and divorce both from Jesus and the writings of the apostles in the NT. You said you hid Barnhart's response. I don't think that's fair to Barnhart. He has excellent insights.

Thank you for attempting to answer, though as others have pointed out a bit more depth would be helpful if we are to engage in a substantive discussion.

The hidden posts have been restored. I did not say Barnhart's was among them, but you may now peruse his insights.

[Valerie]

Standard conservative anabaptist line.
Marriage is a covenant for life.
Divorce is a separation between married people, but it does not nullify the commitment. Both/Either partner (whomever stays committed to walking with Christ) is held to the expectation that they will be faithful to that commitment, even in the absence/abandonment of their spouse.
Remarriage after divorce is thus seen as a state of adultery.
The exception to this would be if a divorced person's former spouse has died. In that case, the covenant has ended. The remaining spouse could marry and it not be considered a state of adultery.

There has already been at least one instance where this was explained to non-believers who had a heart for following Jesus. one or both of them had been married and divorced, but they had found happiness with each other. They were raising children together. They asked what Jesus wanted of them. They were told Jesus would ask them to divide their family, because they were living in a lifestyle of adultery. This was too much for them to do.

When we were first seeking and a Baptist churches, namely charity at the time, I had been divorced and my husband and I would be to them consider living in adultery. When we were married in 1992 a pastor had walked us through scriptures regarding our situation and Our church at that time believed that I was allowed to remarry. We went to Pennsylvania to speak with charity pastors they also said we would need to separate. My husband had already lost his career from loss of vision at that point couldn’t drive etc. so even though we could understand their position, we didn’t feel 100% that’s what the Lord would want us to do. We really weren’t sure which interpretation was correct. The one we had originally received, allowing for re-marriage on my part my husband had not been married. Or the Baptist position because it did not seem God‘s will would be to a family. Our present church at that time believed it was totally unscriptural to ask us to separate and they believed our marriage was valid scripture. It’s a tough situation for people seeking out a baptism.

We really struggled with all of this for several years. In the meantime, my first husband died at 56 yo. My first husband had already remarried before I did so it didn’t make sense to break up my Christian marriage to go back to someone who was married and was not a Christian. In the meantime, there was enough about Anabaptists theology we weren’t 100% in agreement with so no longer pursued that however I always wondered once my first husband had passed away if at that point if we were still pursuing churches like Charity, if my second marriage would then be acceptable because Apostle Paul said you are no longer living in adultery if your first spouse died. Thoughts on that part?

[JimFoxvog]

We affirm the Confession of Faith in a Mennonite Perspective. A few snips from the article on marriage, https://www.mennoniteusa.org/who-are-me ... /marriage/

We believe that God intends marriage to be a covenant between one man and one woman for life.

Some in the church experience divorce, abuse, sexual misconduct, and other problems that make marriage and family life burdensome or even impossible. Jesus affirmed the sanctity of marriage (Matt. 5:32) and pointed to hardness of the heart as the ultimate cause of divorce (Mark 10:4-9). Today’s church needs to uphold the permanency of marriage and help couples in conflict move toward reconciliation. At the same time, the church, as a reconciling and forgiving community, offers healing and new beginnings. The church is to bring strength and healing to individuals and families.

[JohnL]

But that didn't answer my question. Do you have a written statement of faith that spells out that position on divorce and remarriage? If so, could you email it to me?

Being small and independent we don’t really have formal written documents like larger groups. We have a search committee that selects preachers and the rest is preached from the pulpit. Some would call it an oral history I suppose.

[JohnL]

Standard conservative anabaptist line.
Marriage is a covenant for life.
Divorce is a separation between married people, but it does not nullify the commitment. Both/Either partner (whomever stays committed to walking with Christ) is held to the expectation that they will be faithful to that commitment, even in the absence/abandonment of their spouse.
Remarriage after divorce is thus seen as a state of adultery.
The exception to this would be if a divorced person's former spouse has died. In that case, the covenant has ended. The remaining spouse could marry and it not be considered a state of adultery.

There has already been at least one instance where this was explained to non-believers who had a heart for following Jesus. one or both of them had been married and divorced, but they had found happiness with each other. They were raising children together. They asked what Jesus wanted of them. They were told Jesus would ask them to divide their family, because they were living in a lifestyle of adultery. This was too much for them to do.

That helps me. Our little church is on the same page as what you describe. So maybe our interpretation isn’t as isolated as some folks are claiming. It’s tough to stand firmly on the Bible teachings when the world is pressuring churches to abandon them but in our pov we’re standing for Christ.