Poll: Age for Dating and Marriage

[Ken]

Research indicates that married people tend to do better economically. Men, in particular, become more productive after marriage, earning between 10% and 40% more than their single counterparts with similar education and job histories.

How interesting. Guys do better financially after marriage, but yet they are told, don't get married until you are financially stable.

Yes, this is called the "marriage premium" and it has been studied extensively. The data seem to show two things happening: (1) marriage allows or motivates men to become more productive, and (2) higher income men are more likely to get married. So it is kind of a chicken and egg thing happening at the same time.

I personally think maturity is more important than financial stability. We know that couples who marry at a very young age (like late teens) tend to have significantly higher divorce rates than those who marry in their early 20s or later with age 25 being about the peak age for success. That has much more to do with maturity than financial stability.

Financial stability isn't the only measure of maturity of course. But it is one easily observed measure. That said, I've seen couples get married in their mid 20s who were not yet financially stable, but they were mature. For example, couples getting married when one (or both) spouses are in college or grad school. Or perhaps they are doing mission work as low paid volunteers. They may not have financial stability at that moment, but they are working towards it diligently.

In any event, I don't think the purpose of marriage is to act as a self-improvement program for young men. That takes the burden away from where it belongs (on the young men) and puts it over on the young women to be the force or factor that sparks improvement in their men. I don't think it is the job of women and marriage to fix up men. And all too often, young women who think they can fix up their man find out to their dismay that they were very mistaken. This seems especially true when couples marry too young.

[temporal1]

Research indicates that married people tend to do better economically. Men, in particular, become more productive after marriage, earning between 10% and 40% more than their single counterparts with similar education and job histories.

How interesting. Guys do better financially after marriage, but yet they are told, don't get married until you are financially stable.

Human reasoning lies are for all.
i can’t recall any reference in scriptures about financial stability before marriage and family.

God promises to provide. (Not through gov policy.)

- - - - - - -

In the (not mainstream) world, i sometimes read about the “success sequence” .. example:
2022 / https://www.deseret.com/2022/5/26/23141 ... -marriage/

The so-called “success sequence” has three steps:
1) Finish high school,
2) get a full-time job and
3) avoid having children before you marry.

[ohio jones]

Financial stability isn't the only measure of maturity of course. But it is one easily observed measure. That said, I've seen couples get married in their mid 20s who were not yet financially stable, but they were mature. For example, couples getting married when one (or both) spouses are in college or grad school. Or perhaps they are doing mission work as low paid volunteers.

I see.

[temporal1]

One close family situation i saw close-up:
A mother was first to graduate college in her family, she taught, married later than most at the time, had 3 boys, 1 daughter, the baby. Their daughter went to teacher’s college, worked one year while living at home, fell for a really nice young man who was a factory worker, he was clean, kind, well-spoken, a hard worker, his father retired from the same big factory. He wanted to be a tool+die worker, that was his plan. He liked his plan. i don’t know how much formal ed he had, i never asked, i would have guessed a B.S., evidently, not. o.and he was Catholic. not practicing.

Mom was DISTRAUGHT.
She was 100% against “her” daughter marrying “beneath” her, i.e., without a degree.
It was sad.

The two married, they had a lovely wedding in her family church. Somehow, mom adjusted.

They built a modest home the first year they were married. They’d saved before marriage. Daughter taught one year before marriage, she lived at home with her parents, they SAVED for the house.

At the time there were no teaching jobs in the factory town, she got another good job, not CEO, but honest work she enjoyed.
She later found she loved the new job, better than teaching. It worked well.

They had a daughter, life was going well.

The factory nearly closed, many were laid off. He was laid off, told it was permanent. Life happens. What a blow.
This caused havoc for years. In time, he increased his education, became an engineer, found work he loved.
Their lives were better - - - not without heartbreak. Not without moving a few times.

Their daughter grew up, went to college, is now in her 40’s, is a dedicated Christian, has done interesting satisfying work, mostly in a large food bank business. No marriage, no children. i don’t hear anyone speak of it, except once, years ago, her father wistfully wished she would marry. (i’m sure he meant he wished she would have that happiness in her life.)

Turns out, “that unwanted guy” is the best thing that ever happened to the family. He’s been the best all these years.

In my experience, this is not (or was not) uncommon.

i mean, people initially being critical of young people’s marriage choices, yet, with the best intentions AND mutual devotion, young ones grow into themselves in the course of marriage. Being of one faith is the best starter. In my view, as problems and blessings arise, for both to know where to turn for answers (Jesus) is powerful. Christian or not, those of faith want their children to marry in the faith.

marriage is about life, life is change. marriage brings two together as one. not husband or wife. husband and wife.

(i wish) Wayne in Maine were here to discuss. i enjoyed reading about how he and Betty got started and lived.
Would be good to hear from Betty and Franzi, too.

[JohnH]

I wonder how much of this is due to the 'trash' dead-end degrees that have been available now for some years. (What I mean is degrees for professions that have few openings. I could be considered an example, except that although there aren't a lot of openings for missiology majors, I went through with it. However, I certainly did experience the lack of qualifications for any available jobs in my area of expertise when we moved to Holmes County when I was just 47. The only two jobs for which I felt I was especially qualified was work for the county in a program for immigrant families, and in doing translation checking for CAM. The county never started that program, and I was probably not 'Plain' enough for CAM, and I may have also been seen as a threat, due to the very thing that qualified me for the job - my long-term experience in Bible translation work. But I DO know first hand how threatened a translator can feel when working with a translation consultant. It can at times feel intensely 'personal'.)

That wouldn't explain why men and women are having opposite trends upon graduation in terms of unemployment.

[Ken]

Financial stability isn't the only measure of maturity of course. But it is one easily observed measure. That said, I've seen couples get married in their mid 20s who were not yet financially stable, but they were mature. For example, couples getting married when one (or both) spouses are in college or grad school. Or perhaps they are doing mission work as low paid volunteers.

I see.

Do you disagree?

[Ken]

I wonder how much of this is due to the 'trash' dead-end degrees that have been available now for some years. (What I mean is degrees for professions that have few openings. I could be considered an example, except that although there aren't a lot of openings for missiology majors, I went through with it. However, I certainly did experience the lack of qualifications for any available jobs in my area of expertise when we moved to Holmes County when I was just 47. The only two jobs for which I felt I was especially qualified was work for the county in a program for immigrant families, and in doing translation checking for CAM. The county never started that program, and I was probably not 'Plain' enough for CAM, and I may have also been seen as a threat, due to the very thing that qualified me for the job - my long-term experience in Bible translation work. But I DO know first hand how threatened a translator can feel when working with a translation consultant. It can at times feel intensely 'personal'.)

That wouldn't explain why men and women are having opposite trends upon graduation in terms of unemployment.

There is growing unemployment at the moment in the tech sector due to AI and layoffs at big firms like Microsoft. Those professions lean heavily male so that could be one thing that is happening right now in 2025. By contrast, nutrition, special education, early childhood education, and nursing are 3 female-leaning majors that are hot right now.

Here are the lowest and highest unemployment rates by major in 2025. Not necessarily what you would expect. For example, Art History does better than all the tech fields: https://www.cnbc.com/2025/05/16/college ... pects.html

[Soloist]

There is growing unemployment at the moment in the tech sector due to AI and layoffs at big firms like Microsoft. Those professions lean heavily male so that could be one thing that is happening right now in 2025. By contrast, nutrition, special education, early childhood education, and nursing are 3 female-leaning majors that are hot right now.

Here are the lowest and highest unemployment rates by major in 2025. Not necessarily what you would expect. For example, Art History does better than all the tech fields: https://www.cnbc.com/2025/05/16/college ... pects.html

That and employers have determined women know how to count better.

[Neto]

I wonder how much of this is due to the 'trash' dead-end degrees that have been available now for some years. (What I mean is degrees for professions that have few openings. I could be considered an example, except that although there aren't a lot of openings for missiology majors, I went through with it. However, I certainly did experience the lack of qualifications for any available jobs in my area of expertise when we moved to Holmes County when I was just 47. The only two jobs for which I felt I was especially qualified was work for the county in a program for immigrant families, and in doing translation checking for CAM. The county never started that program, and I was probably not 'Plain' enough for CAM, and I may have also been seen as a threat, due to the very thing that qualified me for the job - my long-term experience in Bible translation work. But I DO know first hand how threatened a translator can feel when working with a translation consultant. It can at times feel intensely 'personal'.)

That wouldn't explain why men and women are having opposite trends upon graduation in terms of unemployment.

I thought I posted a response to this earlier, but apparently didn't finalize it correctly.

The main title of the graph is what I was responding to, comparing the jobless rates for college grads to that of non-grads. (The difference between men & women appears to be roughly consistent. There may be some salient factors other than gender-based comparative pay or employment rights, such as general social expectations of the society of which these young people are a part. Some cultures view employment status for men quite differently than for women. This can transform into differing intensity of social pressure to maintain employment.)

[temporal1]

i recognize housewives and mothers as working, i’m never sure how this is accounted for.