Growing up, i listened to various stories about how i surprised “everyone,” and how i changed things, without knowing or trying.
In the world i was born into, marriage was profoundly important for the privilege of physical intimacy, which was widely recognized as the source of conception, planned or not. Marriage provided the basic structure to provide for dependents, wife+children, whatever number.
Life wasn’t nearly so much about what anyone “wanted.”
Life was what unfolded through the privilege of living. i suppose, before free/cheap birth control pills, FEW of us were “planned+wanted” as typical definitions today would be. Pregnancies were what happened in marriage, ready, willing - or not.
My mother often spoke of various very unwanted pregnancies, that later turned out to be the blessings of lifetimes!
Of unwilling parents who learned to be loving devoted parents. Of course, there was misery. Life can be hard.
Life was valued, even when hard times were very hard. “Always room for one more at the table,” meant, everyone, not just the already born.
This might be an interesting poll. We’ll see.
