Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Christian ethics and theology with an Anabaptist perspective
steve-in-kville

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by steve-in-kville »

mike wrote: ↑Thu Feb 25, 2021 7:38 am
steve-in-kville wrote:I'm not saying there should be term limits... but our church votes every four years on a the position of lead pastor. In the entire history of our church, I don't think we've ever voted someone out, but the option is there if things go sideways. They've all served until retirement.
Interesting. I've figured that if there were terms, a lot leaders would probably be reelected.
The Dunkard Brethren did the same thing, except they call them Elders in charge. And interestingly, each congregation can pick from any elder within their district. And even more interesting, it was common for the more experienced & "popular" elders to be in charge of multiple congregations!
0 x
DMills
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Feb 17, 2021 10:15 am
Affiliation: Anabaptist

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by DMills »

Yes, absolutely. Basically every point on your list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life in most ultra conservative groups. I have close connections to several of these groups and I can tell you for a fact that this is true. It makes for a very un-Christian miserable church environment.
0 x
ken_sylvania

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by ken_sylvania »

DMills wrote: ↑Mon Mar 08, 2021 10:35 pm Yes, absolutely. Basically every point on your list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life in most ultra conservative groups. I have close connections to several of these groups and I can tell you for a fact that this is true. It makes for a very un-Christian miserable church environment.
If "most" ultra conservative Christians are locked in an un-Christian, miserable church environment, they certainly do an excellent job of hiding their misery. My observation has been that there is just as much misery in the more "permissive" settings.
0 x
DMills
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Feb 17, 2021 10:15 am
Affiliation: Anabaptist

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by DMills »

ken_sylvania wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 11:10 am
DMills wrote: ↑Mon Mar 08, 2021 10:35 pm Yes, absolutely. Basically every point on your list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life in most ultra conservative groups. I have close connections to several of these groups and I can tell you for a fact that this is true. It makes for a very un-Christian miserable church environment.
If "most" ultra conservative Christians are locked in an un-Christian, miserable church environment, they certainly do an excellent job of hiding their misery. My observation has been that there is just as much misery in the more "permissive" settings.
Yes, they certainly do a good job of hiding it. It's the classic authoritarian setup where everyone is too scared to speak and so in public everyone puts on a happy face and especially when around the "outsiders". You get into an intimate one on one conversation with people from some of these groups and wow it doesn't sound good. But I agree with you that more liberal settings certainly aren't exempt from problems and power struggles either. However the question was "is there spiritual abuse among conservative groups" and that is what I was answering for.
0 x
ken_sylvania

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by ken_sylvania »

DMills wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 3:10 pm
ken_sylvania wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 11:10 am
DMills wrote: ↑Mon Mar 08, 2021 10:35 pm Yes, absolutely. Basically every point on your list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life in most ultra conservative groups. I have close connections to several of these groups and I can tell you for a fact that this is true. It makes for a very un-Christian miserable church environment.
If "most" ultra conservative Christians are locked in an un-Christian, miserable church environment, they certainly do an excellent job of hiding their misery. My observation has been that there is just as much misery in the more "permissive" settings.
Yes, they certainly do a good job of hiding it. It's the classic authoritarian setup where everyone is too scared to speak and so in public everyone puts on a happy face and especially when around the "outsiders". You get into an intimate one on one conversation with people from some of these groups and wow it doesn't sound good. But I agree with you that more liberal settings certainly aren't exempt from problems and power struggles either. However the question was "is there spiritual abuse among conservative groups" and that is what I was answering for.
And there is among some, but can you honestly say that you are enough of an "insider" in "most ultra conservative groups" to be able to state with certainty that "basically every point on the list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life" in "most groups"? Perhaps I am what you consider an outsider, or perhaps the sample of conservative groups I've become familiar with is unusual, but I can tell you that statement does not accurately describe my experience.
0 x
DMills
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Feb 17, 2021 10:15 am
Affiliation: Anabaptist

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by DMills »

ken_sylvania wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 5:41 pm
DMills wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 3:10 pm
ken_sylvania wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 11:10 am
If "most" ultra conservative Christians are locked in an un-Christian, miserable church environment, they certainly do an excellent job of hiding their misery. My observation has been that there is just as much misery in the more "permissive" settings.
Yes, they certainly do a good job of hiding it. It's the classic authoritarian setup where everyone is too scared to speak and so in public everyone puts on a happy face and especially when around the "outsiders". You get into an intimate one on one conversation with people from some of these groups and wow it doesn't sound good. But I agree with you that more liberal settings certainly aren't exempt from problems and power struggles either. However the question was "is there spiritual abuse among conservative groups" and that is what I was answering for.
And there is among some, but can you honestly say that you are enough of an "insider" in "most ultra conservative groups" to be able to state with certainty that "basically every point on the list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life" in "most groups"? Perhaps I am what you consider an outsider, or perhaps the sample of conservative groups I've become familiar with is unusual, but I can tell you that statement does not accurately describe my experience.
Absolutely!
0 x
Soloist

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by Soloist »

Well... I'm likely one of the closest on here to an ultra conservative and the most abuse I've heard of is in relational miscommunications (like everywhere) and making the ladies sleep in caps. :shock:

This stuff does go on, but its not a wide spread every conservative group. Please don't imply it does because it most assuredly doesn't.
0 x
Josh

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by Josh »

ken_sylvania wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 11:10 am
DMills wrote: ↑Mon Mar 08, 2021 10:35 pm Yes, absolutely. Basically every point on your list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life in most ultra conservative groups. I have close connections to several of these groups and I can tell you for a fact that this is true. It makes for a very un-Christian miserable church environment.
If "most" ultra conservative Christians are locked in an un-Christian, miserable church environment, they certainly do an excellent job of hiding their misery. My observation has been that there is just as much misery in the more "permissive" settings.
My parents never strayed outside of evangelical circles that were not plain, Mennonite, or ultra conservative, yet they experienced the exact same kind of misery. Top down authoritarian control, abuse of authority, horrible church splits.
0 x
Josh

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by Josh »

Soloist wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 7:31 pm Well... I'm likely one of the closest on here to an ultra conservative and the most abuse I've heard of is in relational miscommunications (like everywhere) and making the ladies sleep in caps. :shock:

This stuff does go on, but its not a wide spread every conservative group. Please don't imply it does because it most assuredly doesn't.
Same here in my setting. I’ve heard a lot of crazy, awful stories, but not involving this kind of spiritual abuse.
0 x
Wade

Re: Spiritual Abuse among conservative Anabaptist groups?

Post by Wade »

Josh wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 7:39 pm
ken_sylvania wrote: ↑Tue Mar 09, 2021 11:10 am
DMills wrote: ↑Mon Mar 08, 2021 10:35 pm Yes, absolutely. Basically every point on your list is very common and almost understood as a fact of life in most ultra conservative groups. I have close connections to several of these groups and I can tell you for a fact that this is true. It makes for a very un-Christian miserable church environment.
If "most" ultra conservative Christians are locked in an un-Christian, miserable church environment, they certainly do an excellent job of hiding their misery. My observation has been that there is just as much misery in the more "permissive" settings.
My parents never strayed outside of evangelical circles that were not plain, Mennonite, or ultra conservative, yet they experienced the exact same kind of misery. Top down authoritarian control, abuse of authority, horrible church splits.
One of the seeker families attending our local Ultra Conservative church grew up heavily involved in the Evangelical world with relatives in leadership positions. The husband told me they will never become members of a church ever again because of the abuse they have seen. Well, now that they have seen and are spending time daily with Ultras they are really changing their minds...! It is exciting watching people grow in the Lord and for lives to walk closer with Christ (and I don't mean because of where they attend -I mean - language, praying, giving, compassion, modesty and etc.)
0 x
Post Reply