Inviting people with tattoos to church functions, socials, etc.

[Valerie]

I’m not sure if I should jump in here or not…

I’m a daughter of a conservative Mennonite deacon who is now not Mennonite. I have tattoos. I have a variety of friends - friends who are Mennonite, and friends who are gay, poly, with maroon hair, body piercings, tattoos, etc. I have friends who do OF.

And I’m proud to be their friend.

One thing I’ve learned is that non-Mennonite people see the plain people much the same way plain people see the purple haired, tattooed people and/or Muslim people.

People that look very different than us can sometimes make us uncomfortable.

However, we are all humans, made in God’s image. We share much of the same human experiences and emotions, thus making it “easy” (not sure that’s the right word…) to hear and understand each other - if we are willing to listen.

Ask questions - not to judge or to give advice, but to LISTEN and to be WITH people, like Jesus did for us.

People with tattoos often have a story behind why they got their tattoos or what they mean. Ask politely. Story telling is powerful, and it’s a way to bring presence to the good and bad in someone’s story.

Be authentic. Don’t always be begging them to go to church with you. Stepping into a church for some is the equivalent to you stepping into a mosque. Be mindful of the cultural differences that might make it hard for someone to be comfortable in your space.

See I appreciate some of what you say & struggle with some.

Scripture teaches that “Friendship with the world is enmity with God” James 4:4
Also it says “Come out from among them and be separate”. 2 Corinthians 6:17

Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?
2 Corinthians 6:14
How do we apply those to our walk with Christ?
People like to say that Jesus was a friend of sinners. But it was in a purposeful way. It wasn’t to be chummy and hang around for enjoyment. It was a purposeful relationship to bring them to himself. That was the sole purpose of his friendship with people.
I became a Christian when I was 15 and I feel like looking back. I let a very compromising life because I still had too many friends that were worldly. I was trying to reach them for Christ, but it also compromise my own walk. I fell in the sand I think because I wasn’t being obedient as far as having 1 foot in the world and 1 foot in the church at least that’s the way I look back on it now why I feel like I was not a victorious Christian back then -any thoughts on that?

[Valerie]

Two weeks ago, I met and invited a young mother with two small children to come to my home to meet my daughter and wife. She had tattoos visible on both of her arms. She said she might some time, but has not. I invited her to church, and she did come, along with her husband and children. In fact my 80 year old uncle, who is as loud and opinionated about tattoos as anyone, was the first person to meet her and visit with her. I have had the husband come out to my place this week to look at some carpentry work that I am interested in hiring him to do for me. If he agrees to do the work, I plan to invite them to stay for dinner.

I don't think anyone at church was uncomfortable in the least with them, and they were went to someones place for a meal. There was also a single man with his two teen age children there for the first time. And a couple other visitors. I think they all went to someones place for a meal. I bet these outsiders were a lot more uncomfortable with our clothes and customs (kneeling for prayer, segregated seating), that our members were with them.

I love this.
I know that the world does not understand. The scripture is teaching against tattoos. I don’t think they’re doing it to be evil most of the time it seems they’re using tattoos to represent things or fond of, but I see some pretty evil tattoos as a cashier seems everybody has them.
There was a tattoo parlor that opened up in Amish country. I was shocked because it just didn’t fit. I walked in out of curiosity and was met with a obvious spirit of darkness that really troubled me, but when I looked around at the books with tattoos most of them were of the realm of darkness for sure. I really think the people in the area were praying that that business would not succeed because it was gone pretty fast.

[Valerie]

One thing I enjoy doing is getting to know worldly people, and often I have been blessed by them instead of me blessing them. Every single person is a child of God, uniquely created by him with a plan. And every single adult person has made mistakes and sinned.

It seems nearly everyone I come in contact with, particularly people who don’t already have a church home they’re happy with, has a lot of tattoos. Sometimes full sleeves and even ones on their face.

Unfortunately, my experience in our Anabaptists church circles is that this seems to make a lot of people uncomfortable. Worldly attire, immodest attire by our standards but normal by worldly standards, piercings, dyed hair, tattoos, and other things seem to make it hard for us to mix much or socialise well.

I was reflecting on what Jesus taught us:

When you host a dinner or a banquet, don’t invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbours so you can be invited by them in return and get repaid. But when you host an elaborate meal, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. Then you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.

It seems when we have a dinner party, Jesus teaches us not to invite our relatives or well of friends, but instead to find the most undesirable people we can, which in Jesus’ time on earth was disabled people.

Do we as plain Anabaptists do this? Would we be opening our homes to the kind of people “from town” who have lots of problems, and perhaps that we think don’t have much to offer us?

Or do we invite our relatives, friends, and other “respectable” church members?

Even though we are all made the image of God, we are not all children of God until we become one of His. I really like that you are trying to reach them. You remember what it was like living life without him and you are doing what HE would want you to do in my opinion. I know people went out of their way to reach me, I was very lost.

[anndet92]

I’m not sure if I should jump in here or not…

I’m a daughter of a conservative Mennonite deacon who is now not Mennonite. I have tattoos. I have a variety of friends - friends who are Mennonite, and friends who are gay, poly, with maroon hair, body piercings, tattoos, etc. I have friends who do OF.

And I’m proud to be their friend.

One thing I’ve learned is that non-Mennonite people see the plain people much the same way plain people see the purple haired, tattooed people and/or Muslim people.

People that look very different than us can sometimes make us uncomfortable.

However, we are all humans, made in God’s image. We share much of the same human experiences and emotions, thus making it “easy” (not sure that’s the right word…) to hear and understand each other - if we are willing to listen.

Ask questions - not to judge or to give advice, but to LISTEN and to be WITH people, like Jesus did for us.

People with tattoos often have a story behind why they got their tattoos or what they mean. Ask politely. Story telling is powerful, and it’s a way to bring presence to the good and bad in someone’s story.

Be authentic. Don’t always be begging them to go to church with you. Stepping into a church for some is the equivalent to you stepping into a mosque. Be mindful of the cultural differences that might make it hard for someone to be comfortable in your space.

See I appreciate some of what you say & struggle with some.

Scripture teaches that “Friendship with the world is enmity with God” James 4:4
Also it says “Come out from among them and be separate”. 2 Corinthians 6:17

Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?
2 Corinthians 6:14
How do we apply those to our walk with Christ?
People like to say that Jesus was a friend of sinners. But it was in a purposeful way. It wasn’t to be chummy and hang around for enjoyment. It was a purposeful relationship to bring them to himself. That was the sole purpose of his friendship with people.
I became a Christian when I was 15 and I feel like looking back. I let a very compromising life because I still had too many friends that were worldly. I was trying to reach them for Christ, but it also compromise my own walk. I fell in the sand I think because I wasn’t being obedient as far as having 1 foot in the world and 1 foot in the church at least that’s the way I look back on it now why I feel like I was not a victorious Christian back then -any thoughts on that?

I understand where you’re coming from.

I don’t really like when we categorize “the world” or “worldly people” because I feel like James is talking about a “system”, not a group of people, per se. The world is a system that loves power and control and thinks meekness and humility is weakness. Churches and religious people sometimes go after power - like the system of this world does. Jesus was the opposite.

I don’t feel like those friends I have are dragging me down. I don’t participate in their lifestyle. But when things go wrong, I listen. When they ask for help, I help. I don’t necessarily preach to them, but they know where I stand, and they respect me. One of my non religious friends will send me Christian songs that she thinks I’ll love.

You can be friends with people without participating in their lifestyle.

Also, maybe it makes a difference that I’m 34 and not a teen? Idk, I’m just thinking outloud.

[barnhart]

I don’t really like when we categorize “the world” or “worldly people” because I feel like James is talking about a “system”, not a group of people, per se. The world is a system that loves power and control and thinks meekness and humility is weakness. Churches and religious people sometimes go after power - like the system of this world does. Jesus was the opposite.

I don’t feel like those friends I have are dragging me down. I don’t participate in their lifestyle. But when things go wrong, I listen. When they ask for help, I help. I don’t necessarily preach to them, but they know where I stand, and they respect me. One of my non religious friends will send me Christian songs that she thinks I’ll love.

You can be friends with people without participating in their lifestyle.

Also, maybe it makes a difference that I’m 34 and not a teen? Idk, I’m just thinking outloud.

I'm glad Jesus was willing to be friends with the people in the world.

[Soloist]

Wife: we have had plenty of people with tattoos at our Church. I remember one of my friends had a bandage over it and was trying to get it removed because she felt ashamed. But nobody was bothering her about it. There were also people with tattoos back in the nw, and I know some of them prefer long sleeves, and some don’t worry about it. I think most cases, it’s more personal embarrassment than anyone intentionally making them feel bad. Someone back there was feeling horrible about it and someone else told them that it was a testimony. it can be very difficult to get those things removed and expensive.

[Valerie]

I don’t really like when we categorize “the world” or “worldly people” because I feel like James is talking about a “system”, not a group of people, per se. The world is a system that loves power and control and thinks meekness and humility is weakness. Churches and religious people sometimes go after power - like the system of this world does. Jesus was the opposite.

I don’t feel like those friends I have are dragging me down. I don’t participate in their lifestyle. But when things go wrong, I listen. When they ask for help, I help. I don’t necessarily preach to them, but they know where I stand, and they respect me. One of my non religious friends will send me Christian songs that she thinks I’ll love.

You can be friends with people without participating in their lifestyle.

Also, maybe it makes a difference that I’m 34 and not a teen? Idk, I’m just thinking outloud.

I'm glad Jesus was willing to be friends with the people in the world.

Okay maybe my theology is off but who did Jesus call “Friend”? Isn’t there a difference between loving people where they are and wanting to lead them to Christ, but help me out- are we to be “friends”? See I’ve been taught otherwise but building relationships- with unbelievers- is that the same as “friendships” ? I thought Jesus made a distinction of who he actually considered “friends”. He sought people out, yes. Maybe I misunderstood.

[mike]

I went to church for years with a good friend and brother who had tattoos. Sometimes he wore long sleeves, sometimes he didn't, and none of us thought much about it. It was just part of who he was in the past.

[barnhart]

I went to church for years with a good friend and brother who had tattoos. Sometimes he wore long sleeves, sometimes he didn't, and none of us thought much about it. It was just part of who he was in the past.

Same.

[PeterG]

I went to church for years with a good friend and brother who had tattoos. Sometimes he wore long sleeves, sometimes he didn't, and none of us thought much about it. It was just part of who he was in the past.

Same.

Ditto.