Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Christian ethics and theology with an Anabaptist perspective
Soloist

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Soloist »

AnthonyMartin wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:50 pm
How does blame change the ministering?
If you want to help someone who makes unwise choices with diet, would you address the cake? or just give insulin?
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AnthonyMartin
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Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by AnthonyMartin »

Soloist wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:52 pm
AnthonyMartin wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:50 pm
How does blame change the ministering?
If you want to help someone who makes unwise choices with diet, would you address the cake? or just give insulin?
Hopefully you address the whole person. It just seems really lopsided in our circles, to me, when it comes to unwanted pregnancies.
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Soloist

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Soloist »

AnthonyMartin wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:53 pm
Soloist wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:52 pm
AnthonyMartin wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:50 pm
How does blame change the ministering?
If you want to help someone who makes unwise choices with diet, would you address the cake? or just give insulin?
Hopefully you address the whole person. It just seems really lopsided in our circles, to me, when it comes to unwanted pregnancies.
I have not encountered that kind of situation. If I did, my wife would be the one counseling her and while I'm sure something like that could come up it wouldn't be the focus at all.
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Ken
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Affiliation: former MCUSA

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Ken »

Soloist wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:46 pm
barnhart wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 5:30 pm
No, I don't think so. Forced sexual activity is always the fault of the perpetrator. Her actions were unwise and sinful but not a justification.
So you see her actions as sinful but not sharing part of the blame? sounds like word play.
Where do you draw the line?

If a woman wears perfume, or open toed shoes, or a skirt that shows her ankles and a man becomes uncontrollably aroused because those are his fetishes, did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes on a date with a man because he sweet-talked her, friends introduced them, they attend the same school or church, and she reciprocates some affection, maybe she likes him and they hold hands or even kiss. And then he gets too 'frisky' in the car and rapes her despite her saying "stop...please stop" Did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes even a step farther, is maybe tipsy, and then realizes what she is doing is wrong and wants to stop. Has she forfeited that right? Must she consent to further sin simply because the guy doesn't want to stop?
1 x
A fool can throw out more questions than a wise man can answer. -RZehr
Soloist

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Soloist »

Ken wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:00 pm
Where do you draw the line?

If a woman wears perfume, or open toed shoes, or a skirt that shows her ankles and a man becomes uncontrollably aroused because those are his fetishes, did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes on a date with a man because he sweet-talked her, friends introduced them, they attend the same school or church, and she reciprocates some affection, maybe she likes him and they hold hands or even kiss. And then he gets too 'frisky' in the car and rapes her despite her saying "stop...please stop" Did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes even a step farther, is maybe tipsy, and then realizes what she is doing is wrong and wants to stop. Has she forfeited that right? Must she consent to further sin simply because the guy doesn't want to stop?
If you go into a den of lions and one eats you, who's fault is it?
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Ken
Posts: 21863
Joined: Thu Jun 13, 2019 12:02 am
Location: Washington State
Affiliation: former MCUSA

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Ken »

Soloist wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:09 pm
Ken wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:00 pm
Where do you draw the line?

If a woman wears perfume, or open toed shoes, or a skirt that shows her ankles and a man becomes uncontrollably aroused because those are his fetishes, did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes on a date with a man because he sweet-talked her, friends introduced them, they attend the same school or church, and she reciprocates some affection, maybe she likes him and they hold hands or even kiss. And then he gets too 'frisky' in the car and rapes her despite her saying "stop...please stop" Did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes even a step farther, is maybe tipsy, and then realizes what she is doing is wrong and wants to stop. Has she forfeited that right? Must she consent to further sin simply because the guy doesn't want to stop?
If you go into a den of lions and one eats you, who's fault is it?
Men are not wild animals. That way of thinking leads straight to Saudi Arabia, Iran, and the Taliban.

We are better than that.
2 x
A fool can throw out more questions than a wise man can answer. -RZehr
justme

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by justme »

Soloist wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:09 pm
Ken wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:00 pm
Where do you draw the line?

If a woman wears perfume, or open toed shoes, or a skirt that shows her ankles and a man becomes uncontrollably aroused because those are his fetishes, did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes on a date with a man because he sweet-talked her, friends introduced them, they attend the same school or church, and she reciprocates some affection, maybe she likes him and they hold hands or even kiss. And then he gets too 'frisky' in the car and rapes her despite her saying "stop...please stop" Did she sin and does she share the blame for getting raped?

If a woman goes even a step farther, is maybe tipsy, and then realizes what she is doing is wrong and wants to stop. Has she forfeited that right? Must she consent to further sin simply because the guy doesn't want to stop?
If you go into a den of lions and one eats you, who's fault is it?
i see some problems with that analogy, soloist.

so the man is the lion, and the female who got raped is the one who got eaten by the lion.

you are equating a man w being a lion.
a lion is only doing what is engrained in the lion and doesn't understand that a human doesn't want to be eaten. in your question, yes, it is the fault of the human who went into the den.

so a man is only doing what is engrained in him? he doesn't understand that he shouldn't? he has no control over his sexual desires or conquests?

i would hope the man would be better than a lion who is only following instinct.
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Soloist

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Soloist »

Ken wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:16 pm
Men are not wild animals. That way of thinking leads straight to Saudi Arabia, Iran, and the Taliban.

We are better than that.
you are missing the point. Its not about a self control issue, its about accepting responsibility for bad choices.

Justme, I'm actually referencing a woman actually engaging in sexual activity and then saying no in mid stride. She has responsibility for her choices. Yes, the man who continues is sinning but the woman is to blame as well.

Either way, this is derailing the subject and I'm stopping doing so.
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justme

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by justme »

that however, doesn't take into account the willing participant who on the morning after cries rape.

it also doesn't take into account the person who has been abused, and whose body betrays them and enjoys it, but they themselves do not want the molestation/abuse. that would take some working thru and figuring out each situation. i'm glad i'm not responsible for any of that.
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Soloist

Re: Ministering to People With Unwanted Pregnancies

Post by Soloist »

justme wrote: ↑Sun Jun 26, 2022 6:23 pm that however, doesn't take into account the willing participant who on the morning after cries rape.

it also doesn't take into account the person who has been abused, and whose body betrays them and enjoys it, but they themselves do not want the molestation/abuse. that would take some working thru and figuring out each situation. i'm glad i'm not responsible for any of that.
yes and I would agree with your final thought as well.
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