The Anabaptist perspective towards dating and/or courtship?

[Ken]

The notion that dating = sex is not actually born out in the data. At least with respect to teenagers. People who study such things have found that teenage sex across all age groups and races/ethnicities has actually declined markedly since the 1990s. Here is one such study: https://ifstudies.org/blog/fewer-americ ... ver-before

Some conclusions...

Fewer than 40% of American high schoolers have ever had sexual intercourse, a decline of over 15 percentage points since the early 1990s. The historic drop is one of the findings in the 2019 iteration of the Youth Risk Behavior Survey (YRBS), a biannual survey administered by the CDC that tracks risky behaviors, including sexual intercourse, among America's high schoolers. Administered to high school students across the country since 1991, the YRBS offers one of the more detailed longitudinal views of the state of high school sexual activity.

What this year's report shows is yet another drop in that activity, consistent with the more or less continuous trend since 1991. Closer examination reveals that most teens are having less sex and delaying sex longer, and that sexually-active teens have fewer lifetime sexual partners. That confirms other data indicating that American teenagers are far more risk averse than their parents, challenging the popular media representation of an increasingly sexualized adolescent life.
. . .
As shown in the figure below, sexual intercourse has declined across racial groups, although for some more so than others. In particular, black high schoolers are less likely than ever to have had sex, dropping from 81.5% in 1991 to 42.3% today—statistically indistinguishable from both white and Hispanic students. Shares of those currently sexually active have similarly dropped, converging around 30% for black, white, and Hispanic students.

And some graphs

[ABC 123]

You can call it whatever you want and present the case for whatever you want, but ultimately young adults have the decision to choose how they will flesh these things out.

The meeting of a spouse is one of those things that can happen in the most unexpected ways.

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

[theodoreclaudius]

You can call it whatever you want and present the case for whatever you want, but ultimately young adults have the decision to choose how they will flesh these things out.

The meeting of a spouse is one of those things that can happen in the most unexpected ways.

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

Very true^ but not everybody who didnt choose marriage in there 20s should feel too discouraged.
The average age a person gets married in the US is 27- 29.
I think this guy is 38 and I have no doubt he can get almost any woman he wants. The question is why is he not marrried?
https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv ... 235044553/


Also, its kind of weird how this ken guy is so focused on minors having sex, we were talking bout finding a spouse. Its very sad to look at those statistics seeing that fornication is so prominent amongst our children. According to that data the majority of children 56.7% have experienced fornication by the end of highschool. If I had children I wouldn't want that for them.

[Grace]

You can call it whatever you want and present the case for whatever you want, but ultimately young adults have the decision to choose how they will flesh these things out.

The meeting of a spouse is one of those things that can happen in the most unexpected ways.

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

Agreed. I have a friend who was asked by a Christian co-worker if she would want to go on a blind date with a young man who the co-worker knew. The young lady was hesitant, but agreed after the co-worker vouched for the young man. She certainly violated the "courtship" formula. Turned out the young man was an upstanding person, just from a different Anabaptist conference. They have a great marriage and a family.

[Ken]

Also, its kind of weird how this ken guy is so focused on minors having sex, we were talking bout finding a spouse. Its very sad to look at those statistics seeing that fornication is so prominent amongst our children. According to that data the majority of children 56.7% have experienced fornication by the end of highschool. If I had children I wouldn't want that for them.

I'm not focused on sex. I'm just pushing back on your assertion that "To the world dating has become almost a euphemism for sex." Maybe that is your own experience, but it is actually the opposite, at least with the young. People are having less sex than they used to and engaging with each other in more and different ways. I think one thing that has definitely changed in the past decade or two is that women have become more empowered to simply say "no." If you look at things like HS heath and sex ed curriculum, one of the biggest points of emphasis is consent and empowering kids to say "no". That didn't used to be the case.

I have three daughters ages 16, 18, and 23. As far as I know, none of them are sexually active but they have active social lives that are probably more interesting and creative than what I did when I was their age back in the day. One difference is that there is probably more group activities happening and less one-on-one dating than used to be the case.

I don't know if any of those trends have filtered down to the conservative Anabaptist community. But they are what I see today.

[ohio jones]

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

That's what happens if you wait for the bus. The Bible clearly says to TRAIN up a child....

[steve-in-kville]

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

That's what happens if you wait for the bus. The Bible clearly says to TRAIN up a child....

I don't see you auditioning for Saturday Night Live anytime soon....

[steve-in-kville]

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

I know men in their 50's that simply tried too hard. Still single.

[Ken]

I know some 30 something year olds who completely missed the bus on finding a spouse because they subscribed to a certain formula that never materialized.

I know men in their 50's that simply tried too hard. Still single.

"Tried too hard?"

I know exactly what you mean. But it isn't always about effort. It is also about meeting women half-way. Sometimes the people who *think* they are trying hard, really aren't trying at all to figure out what the opposite sex is looking for.

[Somebody]

Did those who 'tried too hard', sincerely pray and ask God to help them find the right one for a wife, and ask Him to help them be the right one for her?