Take a break?

[Bootstrap]

From another thread:

It's a certain serious mindedness and slowness to get worked up or take offense, and unwillingness to give offense.

I don't know if it's a Menno thing specifically. Maybe it's age and maturity, maybe it's being CM, or maybe it's just being Canadian.

I'd love to see MN look more like that - even though I am certainly part of the problem. Are there ways we can help each other get there?

[steve-in-kville]

I will admit, I certainly see tension in some of the recent threads. Almost like people are making things personal... maybe I'm way off.

[temporal1]

I will admit, I certainly see tension in some of the recent threads. Almost like people are making things personal... maybe I'm way off.

tensions and complaints are part of the fabric of this forum, going ‘way back. members have responded in a few different ways .. to my knowledge, admin and mods have not led a formal movement to control content or tone .. Robert has stated a few times, to paraphrase, he wants this forum to be one of adults, he’s not running a daycare.

one method is to avoid unwanted threads/categories, each member’s choice.

another is to make use of “bunny trails” types of threads to address (squabbles, and, bunny trails.)

another is to make use of the forum “foe” option, which, in my view, is more of an “ignore” option, to limit content from any one member from immediate view.

another frequently used method is to simply take a break from forum. again, Robert’s call to personal accountability. some will say they are taking a break, others just go. some do both.

another is to notice who may be regularly starting contentious topics, and avoid those threads.
i have failed at that recently. i have made use of the “ignore” option, and, hope that will help.

i thought of requesting a foe option for forum categories! -
but, as Robert dreams, i’m trying to learn to be a self-reliant adult.

i look to forum admin and moderators for guidance.
they are readily available for questions, on open forum, or privately.
they do a terrific job, they are not (the noisiest among us.)

i may have overlooked some methods. not intentionally.

this is just to reflect tried+true methods to newer members.
the “APB” style “call to order” is not what this forum has ever been about.

APB
“An all-points bulletin (APB) is a broadcast issued from any American or Canadian law enforcement agency to its personnel, or to other law enforcement agencies ..

i agree with Robert: be an adult.

[steve-in-kville]

i agree with Robert: be an adult.

Another forum I frequent has a policy:

If you don't like what someone has to say, put them on ignore. If you complain to a mod about someone (and you didn't use the ignore feature) no action will be taken. It really cut down on the mods going around putting fires out.

[Robert]

Robert, there's one thread where you think I haven't answered your question yet. If you want, I will respond there before exiting the thread. It's up to you, I have no particular need to respond again on that topic.

Yes, please.

[temporal1]

i agree with Robert: be an adult.

Another forum I frequent has a policy:

If you don't like what someone has to say, put them on ignore. If you complain to a mod about someone (and you didn't use the ignore feature) no action will be taken. It really cut down on the mods going around putting fires out.

sounds like the kind of thing our mods here would employ.
btw, i enjoy your posts, i sense you to be an adult-ish kinda guy.

some are reluctant to use the “foe” option, ‘cause, the word is an exaggeration.
it’s really an “ignore” option, the word, “foe,” is off-putting. but that’s what it is.

[haithabu]

Here are some passages which if we all aspire to I believe would help us be at our best as a group:

Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another.

Galations 5:26

I don't understand this as meaning we shouldn't challenge or express concern about each other's ideas -

Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17

- but we should remove as move as much as possible the element of personal challenge - devaluing, disrespecting another, questioning one's right to even be on the forum, one's good faith or motivations.

Of His own will He brought us forth by the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of His creatures. So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.

James 1:18,19

To me that means before engaging someone on something, to be sure that I really understand what they are saying, what its internal logic is, what are the unspoken assumptions and to look for the grain of truth in what they are saying.

...but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence.

I Peter 3:15

I think the latter verse applies equally to when we are challenged by other believers regarding our beliefs or affiliations as when we are challenged by unbelievers.

Gentleness and respect go a very long way in disarming someone else's personal challenge.

[temporal1]

Here are some passages which if we all aspire to I believe would help us be at our best as a group:

Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another.
Galations 5:26

I don't understand this as meaning we shouldn't challenge or express concern about each other's ideas -

Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17

- but we should remove as move as much as possible the element of personal challenge - devaluing, disrespecting another, questioning one's right to even be on the forum, one's good faith or motivations.

Of His own will He brought us forth by the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of His creatures. So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
James 1:18,19

To me that means before engaging someone on something, to be sure that I really understand what they are saying, what its internal logic is, what are the unspoken assumptions and to look for the grain of truth in what they are saying.

...but sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts, always being ready to make a defense to everyone who asks you to give an account for the hope that is in you, yet with gentleness and reverence.
I Peter 3:15

I think the latter verse applies equally to when we are challenged by other believers regarding our beliefs or affiliations as when we are challenged by unbelievers.

Gentleness and respect go a very long way in disarming someone else's personal challenge.

to be true, i recognize all these verses in action on this forum, in abundance.
some examples of grace are staggering.
i suppose these are more easily overlooked and taken for granted than contention.