Trudy Metzger/Steve Stutzman

[JohnH]

This is a great question.

Start with the premise that there are very few false allegations of sexual abuse in Mennonite culture. From a young age, we are taught that lying is wrong.

That is probably the case; however, it doesn't mean that liars don't exist in our circles. Clearly, we do have perpetrators of abuse who exist, and we probably also have people who are chronic liars too.

If the culture changes were speaking up is encouraged, then the social cost for doing so will rapidly decrease or hit zero, and then we will also be dealing with a lot more false claims. I have said that, currently, we can expect false claims to be very rare, but that is a "luxury" we might not have in the future - therefore, we need to act on the claims we get right now, quickly.

Even outside of Mennonite culture, the reported allegations that have been proven to be false is 1-2%.

I would hesitate to quote this as fact. Actual false claims are a lot higher than that, according to some sources. That doesn't mean that we shouldn't give victims the benefit of the doubt and try to get to the bottom of things; it does mean that the fact someone makes a claim doesn't automatically make it true.

Doubling down on claiming that everything an alleged victim claims is true won't get us anywhere good, and as I have said before, a lot of victims never speak out at all. We need other ways to identify and catch perpetrators. We also need to be aware that false claims do happen, and will happen, and not to let that stop us from catching and dealing with perpetrators. The primary source of information should never be a victim alone, and in legal terms, that's not enough for an indictment and a conviction either. There is often lots of evidence elsewhere.

[Judas Maccabeus]

This is a great question.

Start with the premise that there are very few false allegations of sexual abuse in Mennonite culture. From a young age, we are taught that lying is wrong.

That is probably the case; however, it doesn't mean that liars don't exist in our circles. Clearly, we do have perpetrators of abuse who exist, and we probably also have people who are chronic liars too.

If the culture changes were speaking up is encouraged, then the social cost for doing so will rapidly decrease or hit zero, and then we will also be dealing with a lot more false claims. I have said that, currently, we can expect false claims to be very rare, but that is a "luxury" we might not have in the future - therefore, we need to act on the claims we get right now, quickly.

Even outside of Mennonite culture, the reported allegations that have been proven to be false is 1-2%.

I would hesitate to quote this as fact. Actual false claims are a lot higher than that, according to some sources. That doesn't mean that we shouldn't give victims the benefit of the doubt and try to get to the bottom of things; it does mean that the fact someone makes a claim doesn't automatically make it true.

Doubling down on claiming that everything an alleged victim claims is true won't get us anywhere good, and as I have said before, a lot of victims never speak out at all. We need other ways to identify and catch perpetrators. We also need to be aware that false claims do happen, and will happen, and not to let that stop us from catching and dealing with perpetrators. The primary source of information should never be a victim alone, and in legal terms, that's not enough for an indictment and a conviction either. There is often lots of evidence elsewhere.

John H gives a good perspective here.

As to "always believe claims made," the prevalence of false claims if a divorce is involved, it is very high. It is sometimes referred to as the "Nuclear option." it is a tactical move to get a better settlement or eliminate the "inconvenience" of visitation rights. I would also be sceptical of claims made long after the event made if a "therapist" is involved. These have an unfortunate history.

[Southerner]

I know we all want to protect children.

I wish this was the case and btw, I appreciate your bluntness.

[mike]

I would also be sceptical of claims made long after the event made if a "therapist" is involved. These have an unfortunate history.

A very sad case of this happened in the church where I grew up. A minister in a church in another state was accused by his daughter (then an adult) of abuse when she was a child. The man lost his position in the church and ended up moving from his home community to ours. He lived there for a number of years before leaving to serve for years with his wife with a book ministry. Some time after he left our community, we heard that his daughter came forward and said the allegations of abuse came out of sessions with a therapist of some sort, and it did not actually happen. But it was far too late, the damage had been done.

[JohnH]

I would also be sceptical of claims made long after the event made if a "therapist" is involved. These have an unfortunate history.

A very sad case of this happened in the church where I grew up. A minister in a church in another state was accused by his daughter (then an adult) of abuse when she was a child. The man lost his position in the church and ended up moving from his home community to ours. He lived there for a number of years before leaving to serve for years with his wife with a book ministry. Some time after he left our community, we heard that his daughter came forward and said the allegations of abuse came out of sessions with a therapist of some sort, and it did not actually happen. But it was far too late, the damage had been done.

Right. Which is why we need to source information from places other than the victims. Trudy does exactly that, including obtaining confessions from multiple perpetrators. (I have specifically heard one of these confessions myself.) She went into more detail here:

https://splash4ripples.com/2026/07/16/p ... -evidence/

This isn’t “social media gossip”; this is her simply explaining why she’s done what she done after Stutzman decided to go public with accusations against her and others. Does anyone really want to attack Trudy and defend those attacking her after reading this?

[Southerner]

I would also be sceptical of claims made long after the event made if a "therapist" is involved. These have an unfortunate history.

A very sad case of this happened in the church where I grew up. A minister in a church in another state was accused by his daughter (then an adult) of abuse when she was a child. The man lost his position in the church and ended up moving from his home community to ours. He lived there for a number of years before leaving to serve for years with his wife with a book ministry. Some time after he left our community, we heard that his daughter came forward and said the allegations of abuse came out of sessions with a therapist of some sort, and it did not actually happen. But it was far too late, the damage had been done.

Right. Which is why we need to source information from places other than the victims.

In other words, fit our kids w a body worn camera??? How many cases involve just a perp and the victim? I betcha it's the majority of them but I will let Ann speak to this. Licensed therapists fill a vital role in finding out what occurred.

[I Timothy]

I would also be sceptical of claims made long after the event made if a "therapist" is involved. These have an unfortunate history.

A very sad case of this happened in the church where I grew up. A minister in a church in another state was accused by his daughter (then an adult) of abuse when she was a child. The man lost his position in the church and ended up moving from his home community to ours. He lived there for a number of years before leaving to serve for years with his wife with a book ministry. Some time after he left our community, we heard that his daughter came forward and said the allegations of abuse came out of sessions with a therapist of some sort, and it did not actually happen. But it was far too late, the damage had been done.

Right. Which is why we need to source information from places other than the victims. Trudy does exactly that, including obtaining confessions from multiple perpetrators. (I have specifically heard one of these confessions myself.) She went into more detail here:

https://splash4ripples.com/2026/07/16/p ... -evidence/

This isn’t “social media gossip”; this is her simply explaining why she’s done what she done after Stutzman decided to go public with accusations against her and others. Does anyone really want to attack Trudy and defend those attacking her after reading this?

I don't know what all Trudy knows about others. But regarding Steve in her post, if the allegation about DD is accurate, the conduct described would generally fit Pennsylvania's legal definition of indecent assault, not s.x assault. That isn't minimizing what happened, indecent assault is still a serious s.x offense. But legal definitions matter because different offenses have different statutory elements and penalties. We can acknowledge the seriousness of the conduct while also using the correct legal terminology.

[JohnH]

A very sad case of this happened in the church where I grew up. A minister in a church in another state was accused by his daughter (then an adult) of abuse when she was a child. The man lost his position in the church and ended up moving from his home community to ours. He lived there for a number of years before leaving to serve for years with his wife with a book ministry. Some time after he left our community, we heard that his daughter came forward and said the allegations of abuse came out of sessions with a therapist of some sort, and it did not actually happen. But it was far too late, the damage had been done.

Right. Which is why we need to source information from places other than the victims. Trudy does exactly that, including obtaining confessions from multiple perpetrators. (I have specifically heard one of these confessions myself.) She went into more detail here:

https://splash4ripples.com/2026/07/16/p ... -evidence/

This isn’t “social media gossip”; this is her simply explaining why she’s done what she done after Stutzman decided to go public with accusations against her and others. Does anyone really want to attack Trudy and defend those attacking her after reading this?

I don't know what all Trudy knows about others. But regarding Steve in her post, if the allegation about DD is accurate, the conduct described would generally fit Pennsylvania's legal definition of indecent assault, not s.x assault. That isn't minimizing what happened, indecent assault is still a serious s.x offense. But legal definitions matter because different offenses have different statutory elements and penalties. We can acknowledge the seriousness of the conduct while also using the correct legal terminology.

It wasn’t in PA; the state did attempt to get an indictment but ultimately was ima me to bring the case to trial, despite his recorded and written confession. Grand jury proceedings aren’t public so I don’t know the exact charge they brought.

[JohnH]

Right. Which is why we need to source information from places other than the victims.

In other words, fit our kids w a body worn camera??? How many cases involve just a perp and the victim? I betcha it's the majority of them but I will let Ann speak to this. Licensed therapists fill a vital role in finding out what occurred.

Licenced therapists have a job to do of helping their client, not conducting an investigation to secure a conviction.

An alleged victim claiming something happened is not enough, and many victims don’t speak out anyway. There are other ways to identify and deal with perpetrators.

[anndet92]

A very sad case of this happened in the church where I grew up. A minister in a church in another state was accused by his daughter (then an adult) of abuse when she was a child. The man lost his position in the church and ended up moving from his home community to ours. He lived there for a number of years before leaving to serve for years with his wife with a book ministry. Some time after he left our community, we heard that his daughter came forward and said the allegations of abuse came out of sessions with a therapist of some sort, and it did not actually happen. But it was far too late, the damage had been done.

Right. Which is why we need to source information from places other than the victims.

In other words, fit our kids w a body worn camera??? How many cases involve just a perp and the victim? I betcha it's the majority of them but I will let Ann speak to this. Licensed therapists fill a vital role in finding out what occurred.

As a survivor, it’s extremely disorienting and horrifying to be abused by so called “Christians”. It’s even more horrifying to suddenly find the worst experience of your life being dissected for the purpose of finding out if you’re “lying”. I cannot describe the horror of this experience adequately, but I’ve often said that I’d rather be a murder victim than a rape victim.

Therapists are not investigators; however, due to how trauma is stored in our brains, especially when trauma happens to us as young kids, that trauma can resurface later in life when we are in a more safe environment. This sometimes happens in therapy. Sometimes it happens when the victims moves away from their childhood home/community. It is actually quite normal for 30-40 year olds to suddenly not be okay mentally, due to trauma memories surfacing.

There really aren’t many perfect abuse cases in terms of “evidence”. Children don’t always tell right away - for many reasons. Even if a rape kit is done immediately after a rape, that kit takes a long time to process.

Survivors are put through the wringer in both churches and the legal system. Professional investigators need to do their job, but again - that takes time. Even then, the investigator may not be able to find physical evidence of a crime, though they believe the crime to have happened as the survivor said.

It’s disheartening. It is disheartening to be thrown into a scenario when everyone suspects you of lying about the most horrific thing you’ve ever experienced.

I think of Jesus. He chose to come to earth as a baby, not a king. Not an adult. He lived with nothing. He didn’t have a house. He chose to associate with the lowly. He chose the side with less power every single time. Those in power hated him for it, and that’s one of the reasons He ended up on the cross.

It would do us well to follow His example.