Can we make MN less hostile?

[Szdfan]

2018 / P.1:

So, what are some ways you will be the change you want to see?

i appreciate Robert’s 2 things which are 5. i’ve tried to incoporate them into my everyday thinking.

I think most of us have participated in the hostility on MN. I didn't think the Robinson thread was hostile, I do think you got pushback and I think some of it is legitmate, but that's my perception. I think we should all pay attention to our own behavior and how it contributes to making MN hostile.

[Bootstrap]

From the OP:

Can we make MN a less hostile place? Can we make it a more useful place to discuss things and learn from each other? What would a better MN look like?

Let's discuss. And while we discuss, can we please avoid insulting each other, directly or indirectly, aggressively or passive-aggressively? Let's not discuss who is to blame, let's try to describe the problem and possible solutions.

Here's why I requested that: one way to be hostile is to accuse other people of hostility and pin blame on "the other side". I think we need to assume and expect disagreement, but disagreement does not need to be hostility.

One way to reduce hostility is to avoid seeing everything as hostility.

^^This challenging topic brought out .. hostilities. (When mutual understanding was the goal.)
This topic proved hard to stay on topic.

I actually don't see hostility in that thread. I do see disagreement. But the exercise is designed in a way that invites people to struggle - in a constructive way, I think.

“NC LT. Governor Nominee Mark Robinson (R)”
viewtopic.php?t=2747&start=30
P.3-4, with CNN featured+quoted+quoted (against forum guidelines) this topic has brought out .. hostilities, accusations.

Again, I do not think it is hostile to say that a politician has credible accusations against him. And I don't think it is helpful to portray that as hostility. If people want to start threads to discuss individual politicians, I would expect a range of views in that thread. None of us here is Mark Robinson.

[Szdfan]

I actually don't see hostility in that thread. I do see disagreement. But the exercise is designed in a way that invites people to struggle - in a constructive way, I think

I think that's an important point -- disagreement, even frustrating disagreement -- is not in itself hostility. I think some of the participants are making a good faith effort to disagree well with each other.

[temporal1]

2025

i thought of this topic as i listened to this young man talk with his mother about their differing political views.
It seemed to be an impromptu phone call between them.

The Millionaire Morning Show w/ Anton Daniels
"Mom, You Need To Stop Being a Democrat ..." Our Parents Are Stuck, Says We Shouldn't Support Trump / 24min
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4NyXnkXG8s

[Szdfan]

Here’s the core issue of what I’d like the moderators to answer:

If I created a new account tomorrow under a different name, would it be a violation of community rules for someone to point out that I’m actually Szdfan? Or would that be considered “doxxing” me?

If the answer is that pointing out a prior username violates forum policy, then I’d like to have a serious conversation about how username changes. Are changes to usernames cosmetic, or are they a “clean slate,” which allows a user to erase their previous history and start over? How is this different from creating a sock puppet account, which is banned on many other forums?

[Robert]

Here’s the core issue of what I’d like the moderators to answer:

If I created a new account tomorrow under a different name, would it be a violation of community rules for someone to point out that I’m actually Szdfan? Or would that be considered “doxxing” me?

If the answer is that pointing out a prior username violates forum policy, then I’d like to have a serious conversation about how username changes. Are changes to usernames cosmetic, or are they a “clean slate,” which allows a user to erase their previous history and start over? How is this different from creating a sock puppet account, which is banned on many other forums?

I moved this here to respond to this. It was buried deep in another thread and brought to my attention by another moderator. It was very off topic so I moved it here to respond, but wanted it in a thread that was open so it could be discussed if others wanted to dig deeper.

I can, and have as administrator changed several usernames at the request of the user over the years.

Many of the name changes, which users can not do themselves, but I can change as administrator, was caused because I was clearing out old bot accounts and made a mistake and cleared out some old users. People had to reregister to gain access again. Some chose that as an opportunity to modify their username. This did not break any rules. We know who they are. Several talked to me about it when they did it.

If you want to change your username or start a new account, just let me know and I will extend you the same grace I have others.

You seem challenged by just one who has done this. Maybe you have not noticed the others who have, or you just are fixating on one. This one has PMed you twice explaining and requesting you use his new username. I would hope that we would have compassion and grace for one another that we do not need a rule to dictate our actions when someone makes a request. If we need a rule for that, then we need to be looking inward not outward.

We do not have the rules other forums have. We try to relay on respect and decency on how we treat each other. One can not regulate morality. Once you start trying, it shows that people are more focused on themselves instead of others and I have no desire to run a forum that does that. It will be time to shut things down or give it to someone else, as it was passed to me years ago.

As far as doxxing, I would hope we would never get involved in such a worldly, uncompassionate action. There have been some in the past that I advised and they removed part of their name in their username because the internet can be a evil mean place and there is no reason to give out full name information just to get online to discuss a few faith based topics.

I go back to the question, why are we here? What is our purpose on and in MennoNet. It should be to have respectful, compassionate discussion with others in a hope to grow ourselves and help others. if a person has a different purpose here, they will be met with resistance from me, and I hope the other moderators.

If someone wants to change their username, they can contact me. We will discuss the whys and it will be addressed with compassion and dignity. If the change needs to be confidential, then we will make that adjustment as needed. There are internet stalkers that do need to be dealt with at times.

If someone feels they have outgrown their username and just want to change it and does not care if others know, they are encouraged to put that in their signature so others know out of respect. We have done that several times in the past.

I hope that clarifies things a little. I would rather questions like that come forward in a more proper place and not buried in a thread that is easily missed because it makes it appear that it was ignored.

[Robert]

Ken has been banned for 7 days after posting political content in the Current Events section twice. I informed him at his last banning of three days that any time I had to move one of his posts, I was giving him a warning. Rules are that after 3 warnings, the poster will be banned for 3 days or more.

Ken has repeatedly posted in the wrong threads and forced the Mods to move and babysit him. He shows no respect for others and just seems to want to plaster his content anywhere he feels like. I have battled the fight for over a year and grow tired of it. He has been banned for 7 days and if he continues his behavior, he will be permanently banned from the site.

[Robert]

Mennonet is a place to bring conversation and discussion.

What I keep seeing is it has devolved into a place to bring political hits on the party one does not like.

Many posts are "See what he/they are doing. It is so wrong and you are an idiot for agreeing with them."

If a politician does something you do not like, direct your comments to that politician. Bringing it here to whine or to "prove" their evilness has no benefit to discussion or conversation. Mennonet should not be your go to spot to bring all your political trash.

If something is happening in the political world and you honestly want to hear the opinions of others, feel free to post, but do so with an open mind and willingness to know that others will disagree and that is okay. We can grow from one another, but currently this is not happening. People are bringing political issues here just to show the "evilness" of said politicians.

We can do better and should do better. Consider others as more important then you. Speak the truth in LOVE, not in spit and bitterness.

[JohnL]

Mennonet is a place to bring conversation and discussion.

What I keep seeing is it has devolved into a place to bring political hits on the party one does not like.

Many posts are "See what he/they are doing. It is so wrong and you are an idiot for agreeing with them."

If a politician does something you do not like, direct your comments to that politician. Bringing it here to whine or to "prove" their evilness has no benefit to discussion or conversation. Mennonet should not be your go to spot to bring all your political trash.

If something is happening in the political world and you honestly want to hear the opinions of others, feel free to post, but do so with an open mind and willingness to know that others will disagree and that is okay. We can grow from one another, but currently this is not happening. People are bringing political issues here just to show the "evilness" of said politicians.

We can do better and should do better. Consider others as more important then you. Speak the truth in LOVE, not in spit and bitterness.

AMEN!

[Valerie]

Mennonet is a place to bring conversation and discussion.

What I keep seeing is it has devolved into a place to bring political hits on the party one does not like.

Many posts are "See what he/they are doing. It is so wrong and you are an idiot for agreeing with them."

If a politician does something you do not like, direct your comments to that politician. Bringing it here to whine or to "prove" their evilness has no benefit to discussion or conversation. Mennonet should not be your go to spot to bring all your political trash.

If something is happening in the political world and you honestly want to hear the opinions of others, feel free to post, but do so with an open mind and willingness to know that others will disagree and that is okay. We can grow from one another, but currently this is not happening. People are bringing political issues here just to show the "evilness" of said politicians.

We can do better and should do better. Consider others as more important then you. Speak the truth in LOVE, not in spit and bitterness.

AMEN!

Amen -

We should all try putting ourselves in the shoes of one coming on the forum for the first time- perhaps a seeker to Anabaptism ad I was long ago it seems.

Take a look at most of the topics going now.
Wouldn’t it shock you if you were a seeker.
And then (gasp) to see the discussions & how people treat each other. Would it make a seeker desire to learn more about Mennonites?