Photographs of the deceased

[Neto]

I think I've mentioned this previously, as a cultural difference between my background (Plautdietsch Dutch Mennonite, AKA 'Russian Mennonite') and my wife's (Swiss Brethren Amish) - the shock she felt when she saw that I had a photo of my grandfather in the casket. (He died in 1972.)

This article appeared on the BBC today, and brought this to mind.

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-66862838

I don't know if my people still commonly do this, but I didn't take one of my maternal grandpa, who died in 1982, or of my Dad, who died in December of 2020. But it was a common custom in my culture, as far back as photography was available to them. (I have the 8x10 of one of my great grandfathers, that was passed down to me.)

I know that the Amish didn't use photography at all, so I'm curious if this was an acceptable practice in other Swiss Brethren groups, or did they all avoid ALL types of photography?

[Josh]

Definitely never heard of more liberal Mennonite groups that allowed photography doing this. It’s not an American custom either (or at least not at any funerals I’ve been to).

Note that many Amish groups including Beachys didn’t accept photography at all or until recently.

[steve-in-kville]

My MIL did this before we closed the casket on my FIL.

Personally, I feel this is poor taste.

[RZehr]

I’ve seen it, but very, very, rarely. It is more common to see pictures being taken at the burial grave site.

[Sudsy]

I knew some people with Yugoslavian background and they had photos on their living room wall of relatives standing around an open casket. Pictures were taken to send back to the mother land for those who were not able to come to the funeral in Canada. It was treated the same as wedding pictures.

At first this custom surprised me but then I thought, why not ? This is a final photo of them and those who remain at this point in time. However, for myself, they will only have a picture of the cremation urn my ashes are in.

[Bootstrap]

When I see someone dead in a casket, I always feel that the person is gone, that the body is now just a body. That's not the way I want to be remembered.

Somehow, it is important for me to see the body, to know that the person is dead, to come to terms with it this way. But I wouldn't want a picture.

[Neto]

I knew some people with Yugoslavian background and they had photos on their living room wall of relatives standing around an open casket. Pictures were taken to send back to the mother land for those who were not able to come to the funeral in Canada. It was treated the same as wedding pictures.

At first this custom surprised me but then I thought, why not ? This is a final photo of them and those who remain at this point in time. However, for myself, they will only have a picture of the cremation urn my ashes are in.

re: cremation: I recently heard a cremation service person (what is the proper name?) say that actually there are no ashes left. What doesn't get sucked out of the furnace with the heat (and possibly exhaust fans) is completely burned up - into smoke. What is actually in the urn is just ground up bones, he said.

[Sudsy]

I knew some people with Yugoslavian background and they had photos on their living room wall of relatives standing around an open casket. Pictures were taken to send back to the mother land for those who were not able to come to the funeral in Canada. It was treated the same as wedding pictures.

At first this custom surprised me but then I thought, why not ? This is a final photo of them and those who remain at this point in time. However, for myself, they will only have a picture of the cremation urn my ashes are in.

re: cremation: I recently heard a cremation service person (what is the proper name?) say that actually there are no ashes left. What doesn't get sucked out of the furnace with the heat (and possibly exhaust fans) is completely burned up - into smoke. What is actually in the urn is just ground up bones, he said.

Yes, although called ashes they are pulverized bone fragments. Also often referred to as 'dust'. 'From dust to dust' - Eccl 3:20

[Soloist]

I knew some people with Yugoslavian background and they had photos on their living room wall of relatives standing around an open casket. Pictures were taken to send back to the mother land for those who were not able to come to the funeral in Canada. It was treated the same as wedding pictures.

At first this custom surprised me but then I thought, why not ? This is a final photo of them and those who remain at this point in time. However, for myself, they will only have a picture of the cremation urn my ashes are in.

re: cremation: I recently heard a cremation service person (what is the proper name?) say that actually there are no ashes left. What doesn't get sucked out of the furnace with the heat (and possibly exhaust fans) is completely burned up - into smoke. What is actually in the urn is just ground up bones, he said.

Wife: In the case of my uncle, it wasn't even his bones in the urn. The funeral home people were secretly selling body parts overseas or something and switching ashes or even giving nonhuman ashes. I think the lady and her daughter got prison time for that.

I agree with preferring a photo of them alive to one at the viewing, but to each their own.

[Neto]

In our culture, we didn't take these photos when non-family were around, and actually, this whole viewing thing is foreign to us, and while I've gotten used to it, I was probably as much repulsed by that as you all are by the casket photos. It just somehow seemed indecent to openly display the dead that way. But this is just a cultural attitude.

So, the next question, this one regarding a much older practice - In the early time of photography it was very expensive, and so sometimes a family whose son or daughter died would pose for a family picture, with the deceased person sitting in a chair as though still alive, or, if it was a very young child or infant, in the arms of the mother. Some will be repulsed simply by the idea of holding a dead child, but otherwise they had no photo of any kind to remember them by. (I do fully realize that I'm "talking past" most Amish-related groups, who even now may still not officially condone pictures of people, although I know that many Amish families do it.)