Divorce & Remarriage

[Chris]

Here is a hypothetical.

A Hindu man marries a woman. They promise to Kali (their God) that they will be married.
Here is a gentle photo of the God they worship. https://www.infoworld.com/article/30608 ... uters.html Other photos you'll find are much more violent and gory.

Okay, so they are pagans. Polytheistic. They believe not only in Kali but many other "Gods/Goddesses". They won't eat a hamburger because a cow is sacred... Imagine worshiping a God that "gives milk" (and this isn't the cow God). So we are talking about some bizarre stuff.

Later, because of whatever reason, they get divorced.

Hindu man, then marries another woman under Kali their pagan God. They are happy at first but then really start wondering why their "Gods" are so funky and evil looking. They find a Bible tract and begin looking into Christianity.

Praise God, they accept Jesus together. They are "as babes". They start having children and training them up in the Lord. 25 years later, they have many children (Let's say 10) and decide to reach out to an Anabaptist church, that is moderate conservative. Their children are trained up in the Lord and know Biblical values and are very good children.

They come into the church excited! These people have "values" they think. Not long thereafter, as they really enjoy the church, it is found out that the man was previously married to wife #1. They are told they are in a state of adultery and are free to attend service but not be members...

Isn't this tragic?

Are we holding NON Christians (EVEN PAGANS) to Jewish/Christian standards on divorce & remarriage after they become Christians?

Book of Matthew, Mark, Luke, John -> Addresses mostly Jews.
Acts -> About early CHRISTIANS.
Romans -> Christians in Rome
Hebrews -> Jews to Jews becoming Christians
Letter to the Corinthians -> Addressing the Church/Christians in Corinth.
(To save typing, ALL the city letters are addressing a church/Christians).

Epistles -> Letters to Christians about Christian teachings/issues.

Is it right to hold pagans and non-Christians to a Biblical sense of marriage/remarriage when their remarriages happened before they even knew of Jesus Christ? Clearly these standards are meant for Christians that KNEW better.

Why are we (as Mennonites) so harsh on non-believers if they have remarried in the past? I'm just curious.

[KingdomBuilder]

Yes... this is a gross misinterpretation by many Mennonites I think.
I heard of, at a local Mennonite church, two converts being told to separate (despite them having 12 kids together) because the husband was married and divorced prior to conversion.

To me, drawing this hard and fast line comes at the cost of what it means to be “Made New” and “Born Again”...

My head hears it like this: “O! you’ve died to your old self and have been raised up anew with Christ! Well... Except for this one thing from your old self... that’ll follow you forever. If you’re offended by this you’re just offended at the true Gospel. Sorry, guess salvation is too costly for you! “

[Josh]

Not all plain, conservative Anabaptists believe this way. Apostolic Christians don’t. Holdeman Mennonites don’t either, and about 8% of their membership is not of European Anabaptist background.

At this point, I view the Amish-background view on divorce and remarriage as basically a tool to exclude undesirable people; I will entertain conservative Mennonites’ objections to divorced and remarried people from the world once they are just as bold and passionate about calling out and disciplining their own members who are wife beaters, adulterers, rapists, and child molesters. In my opinion, these are much graver sins in the eyes of God that peope from the world who are remarried.

I won’t be holding my breath.

[mike]

Not all plain, conservative Anabaptists believe this way. Apostolic Christians don’t. Holdeman Mennonites don’t either, and about 8% of their membership is not of European Anabaptist background.

At this point, I view the Amish-background view on divorce and remarriage as basically a tool to exclude undesirable people; I will entertain conservative Mennonites’ objections to divorced and remarried people from the world once they are just as bold and passionate about calling out and disciplining their own members who are wife beaters, adulterers, rapists, and child molesters. In my opinion, these are much graver sins in the eyes of God that peope from the world who are remarried.

I won’t be holding my breath.

Is the Holdeman Mennonites' refusal to accept as valid the baptisms of other churches also a tool to exclude undesirable people?

[MaxPC]

Chris, I can share the Catholic teaching in this:
We would not consider the first “union” a marriage and the second union we would seek to help the couple to consecrate their marriage through the Church. Some do a full on wedding ceremony, others opt for quiet and private.

[mike]

Here is a non-hypothetical, real situation.

I know a man who committed a serious crime and received a 15-40 year prison sentence. His wife has five children aged about 10 and younger. Most people in this woman's life, including her parents, have advised her to divorce her husband and move forward with her life, including possible remarriage. It goes without saying that her life for the past several years as a veritable single mom, now having to work full-time to provide for her family, is extremely difficult. The prospect of spending much of her life in this circumstance is daunting beyond words.

Would those of you who oppose the conservative Anabaptist position on D&R advise her, as do most of her acquaintances in her evangelical Protestant church, to divorce her husband and marry another? Or would you support her in her desire to remain faithful to him?

[MaxPC]

Here is a non-hypothetical, real situation.

I know a man who committed a serious crime and received a 15-40 year prison sentence. His wife has five children aged about 10 and younger. Most people in this woman's life, including her parents, have advised her to divorce her husband and move forward with her life, including possible remarriage. It goes without saying that her life for the past several years as a veritable single mom, now having to work full-time to provide for her family, is extremely difficult. The prospect of spending much of her life in this circumstance is daunting beyond words.

Would those of you who oppose the conservative Anabaptist position on D&R advise her, as do most of her acquaintances in her evangelical Protestant church, to divorce her husband and marry another? Or would you support her in her desire to remain faithful to him?

Are they Christians and belonging to a fellowship that teaches against D&R?

[Josh]

Not all plain, conservative Anabaptists believe this way. Apostolic Christians don’t. Holdeman Mennonites don’t either, and about 8% of their membership is not of European Anabaptist background.

At this point, I view the Amish-background view on divorce and remarriage as basically a tool to exclude undesirable people; I will entertain conservative Mennonites’ objections to divorced and remarried people from the world once they are just as bold and passionate about calling out and disciplining their own members who are wife beaters, adulterers, rapists, and child molesters. In my opinion, these are much graver sins in the eyes of God that peope from the world who are remarried.

I won’t be holding my breath.

Is the Holdeman Mennonites' refusal to accept as valid the baptisms of other churches also a tool to exclude undesirable people?

Huh? How does this exclude anyone?

Nobody is barred from baptism or membership.

[Josh]

Here is a non-hypothetical, real situation.

I know a man who committed a serious crime and received a 15-40 year prison sentence. His wife has five children aged about 10 and younger. Most people in this woman's life, including her parents, have advised her to divorce her husband and move forward with her life, including possible remarriage. It goes without saying that her life for the past several years as a veritable single mom, now having to work full-time to provide for her family, is extremely difficult. The prospect of spending much of her life in this circumstance is daunting beyond words.

Would those of you who oppose the conservative Anabaptist position on D&R advise her, as do most of her acquaintances in her evangelical Protestant church, to divorce her husband and marry another? Or would you support her in her desire to remain faithful to him?

That would depend on if he did something to break the marriage bond, like adultery, and the circumstances under which they were originally married, such as if she were a believer who understood marriage is to be for life.

Generally speaking, in our church, divorcing your spouse is strongly discouraged. It’s a different situation when someone’s spouse abandons them, is unfaithful, or goes and marries someone else and has children with that new spouse.

[mike]

Not all plain, conservative Anabaptists believe this way. Apostolic Christians don’t. Holdeman Mennonites don’t either, and about 8% of their membership is not of European Anabaptist background.

At this point, I view the Amish-background view on divorce and remarriage as basically a tool to exclude undesirable people; I will entertain conservative Mennonites’ objections to divorced and remarried people from the world once they are just as bold and passionate about calling out and disciplining their own members who are wife beaters, adulterers, rapists, and child molesters. In my opinion, these are much graver sins in the eyes of God that peope from the world who are remarried.

I won’t be holding my breath.

Is the Holdeman Mennonites' refusal to accept as valid the baptisms of other churches also a tool to exclude undesirable people?

Huh? How does this exclude anyone?

Nobody is barred from baptism or membership.

I am quite sure that there are requirements for baptism and membership in the Holdeman church. In my opinion, it is no more unfair to say that this excludes undesirable people than it is to say that the conservative Anabaptist position on D&R excludes undesirable people.