Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Christian ethics and theology with an Anabaptist perspective
Valerie
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by Valerie »

Mrs.Nisly wrote:
Valerie wrote:I honestly think the enemy of our soul gets involved here. He is after all, the father of lies.
There was a period in my life where I was very wounded- most of my life, had been very respected, voted for things, popular in school, etc- (this was one reason I had to consider becoming a Christian as dying to those things I had learned to love & probably, depend on- unknowingly)
A series of events caused me to spiral downward - made mistakes, sinned, etc- and it seemed caused me to be extra sensitive then to every criticism or negative remark- although I didn't respond to these, they hurt deeply.
After falling away from the Lord for some time, a friend, then her pastor, helped me get right with the Lord again- this pastor said I had a 'wounded spirit, and spirit of rejection'. Well, he didn't know me, but was spot on about that- at this point in my life. Of course the enemy of our soul can have a hay day with this and add to it-

Without the Lord healing and helping you overcome these things, believing God's Word and drawing close to Him in love and prayer, I honestly don't see how people can overcome these wounds- but I will attest to the fact that if you've gone through these 'periods' or if your life was one long hurt after another, yes you will become more 'prone' to being hurt- it's kind of like a wound that scabs and then something happens to take the scab off the wound again- with some, without knowing the Lord, and not being able to recognize the voice of the enemy whose desire is to take you down, who is a liar and the father of lies, who goes about like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour-- well- look around, some lose hope completely- and take their life, or can leave the Church, and the Lord, altogether-
Valerie,
I think you are absolutely correct.

This kind of thing is from Satan and he is having a heyday in the church. We live in a world where the only "truth" is what I feel. There is no rational objective truth.
This way of thinking absolutely paralyzes relationships. Despite ones very best efforts, folks who live like this need constant affirmation, sniff out any critique they perceive is in even positive comments. They then accuse others of being intolerant, un-loving or hateful.

A very dear friend of mine described a family meeting they had where her sister-in-law was gently being asked why she chose to announce to the world on social media that she was bi-sexual, without saying a word about it to her family first. When they tried to explain why this mattered to them, she threw a dramatic fit, shrieking, "This is about ME!, This is my life!" and she walked out of the meeting and sat in the car, leaving her husband to try to explain to his family what was going on. While this family is not a Mennonite family, they are the kindest, most open hearted people around. They have been through a lot of difficult things including divorce, alcohol, and abuse, so I know they were not condemning this girl, they were simply calling for some openness and honesty.

Honestly, when I hear tales of woe and how terribly someone has been treated by other Christians, I take it with a grain of salt. Usually the other party is not there to defend themselves, so how do you really know how something happened?
There are always two sides to a story.
An honest person will maximize their own failures and minimize the other party's failures.
What a sad story you share Mrs. Nisley, and unfortunately not surprising at all. Actually this mention of the girl who is bi-sexual- it seems we see these kinds of outragous behaviors connected with this particular type of sexual immorality too-
We have dealt with the 'outrage' and super sensitivity here on the forum from similar sexual/gender confusion.
I don't know what to think of this growing population as you describe other than to see satan being involved and the need for people to be delivered from his/(their, deomonic) stronghold(s) -
Yet there are some who really need wounds healed and perhaps there is more to the 'roots' of these folks than we can immediately recognize- then again- when you realize they seem to enjoy or look for ways to be wounded you're left, as you say- taking their stories with a grain of salt, it doesn't take long to recognize the patterns.
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MaxPC
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by MaxPC »

I was reminded of this thread when I found this sermon over at Pilgrim Ministry.
Helping the Over-Sensitive Conscience
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KingdomBuilder
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by KingdomBuilder »

Above all, it's important to show love to brothers and sisters.

It's not our job to become psycho-analysists. We shouldn't try to sift out obscure motives, root causes, and legitimacies.
Our job is, however, to love one another.
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steve-in-kville
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by steve-in-kville »

KingdomBuilder wrote:Above all, it's important to show love to brothers and sisters.

It's not our job to become psycho-analysists. We shouldn't try to sift out obscure motives, root causes, and legitimacies.
Our job is, however, to love one another.
True, But sometimes that love needs to be tough love.
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Valerie
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by Valerie »

steve-in-kville wrote:
KingdomBuilder wrote:Above all, it's important to show love to brothers and sisters.

It's not our job to become psycho-analysists. We shouldn't try to sift out obscure motives, root causes, and legitimacies.
Our job is, however, to love one another.
True, But sometimes that love needs to be tough love.
Amen-

"As physicians, treating the body, do not prescribe the same remedy to all, so also God, in treating sicknesses of the soul, has more than one means of healing; and giving each soul what it needs, He makes it whole. So let us give thanks to Him when we are being healed, even if what happens to us brings suffering; for the end is bliss."
St. Maximus the Confessor
"The Philokalia"
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francis
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by francis »

Valerie wrote:
steve-in-kville wrote:
KingdomBuilder wrote:Above all, it's important to show love to brothers and sisters.

It's not our job to become psycho-analysists. We shouldn't try to sift out obscure motives, root causes, and legitimacies.
Our job is, however, to love one another.
True, But sometimes that love needs to be tough love.
Amen-

"As physicians, treating the body, do not prescribe the same remedy to all, so also God, in treating sicknesses of the soul, has more than one means of healing; and giving each soul what it needs, He makes it whole. So let us give thanks to Him when we are being healed, even if what happens to us brings suffering; for the end is bliss."
St. Maximus the Confessor
"The Philokalia"
A small adendum: I think this is sometimes not the case. Perhaps one needs "tough love" with one's friends, but because we can't truly know another's situation unless we know them well, I'm hesitant to endorse "tough love"
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JimFoxvog
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Re: Are some people just prone to being hurt?

Post by JimFoxvog »

francis wrote:A small addendum: I think this is sometimes not the case. Perhaps one needs "tough love" with one's friends, but because we can't truly know another's situation unless we know them well, I'm hesitant to endorse "tough love"
The problem with "tough love" is that the term is often applied without love. That just makes it tough.
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