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steve-in-kville wrote:Yeah, and 20 years later no one will remember that their first child was conceived out of wedlock. Fancy how that works

Unfortunately, in some churches, that will never be forgotten.

Chris wrote:Cast the first stone, if you please.

Let's face it, there are Christians who still believe that casting that stone is a great way to prove their own holiness. They didn't get the memo from Jesus. They are acting as though the Pharisees are the perfect example of pure spirituality, beyond criticism.

So when you join a church, look around. Do the people look and act more like Jesus or more like the Pharisees? Are they busy figuring out how to trust, love, and obey or figuring out how to make a good impression and demonstrate their own righteousness to others? Are they more into redemption or more into judgement?

A church without grace is a church without Jesus.

Chris wrote:I had one older guy at church tell me how this young man got his wife pregnant BEFORE they were married. My response "So what's that to me, I'm glad they got married". I mean wow guys. Is it supposed to be like "ooooo look, they did fornication!!!" wow, snivelty snivet, snicker snicker now I got my ounce of gossip to shmoz and spread around... It was ridiculous.

You wouldn't talk about people other people's wrongs like that, would you??

ken_sylvania wrote:

Chris wrote:I had one older guy at church tell me how this young man got his wife pregnant BEFORE they were married. My response "So what's that to me, I'm glad they got married". I mean wow guys. Is it supposed to be like "ooooo look, they did fornication!!!" wow, snivelty snivet, snicker snicker now I got my ounce of gossip to shmoz and spread around... It was ridiculous.

You wouldn't talk about people other people's wrongs like that, would you??

I would be very angry with myself if I did. Especially if I specifically mentioned who a person was. If I must reference somebody's wrong, I had to witness in 1st person and I try not to put names or imputed names. When I was told this, the name and person was specifically mentioned.

Point being, when people dig up, pry into, and crack open the closet door to let skeletons out OR for some reason or another a person opens the closet themselves to let it out, I just think its a bad dramatic idea.

Let it go. Jesus forgives.

I agree with the previous post where it was mentioned "in 20 years nobody will remember their first was conceived out of wedlock". So true.

Bootstrap wrote: Unfortunately, in some churches, that will never be forgotten.

This is true. We were associated with a group that offered no chance at redemption. It was a KMF group, so it's not like it was all that super hard-core conservative. There were two groups of people: those who got caught in sin, and those who just didn't get caught... yet.

Those that got caught were basically black-listed by the bishop. It was somewhat known as his "black list" across that district. It was pretty bad. There were men (and a few ladies) that had their membership taken and can never get it back. All the burnt offerings in the world could not help them. It was in stone... forever.

steve-in-kville wrote:There were two groups of people: those who got caught in sin, and those who just didn't get caught... yet.

Your comment both blessed me and theologically enriched me, even as it deals with sin. We have all fallen short of the glory of God. No man is perfect. I have a phone poll beam in my eye.

I would seriously advise people not to dig into people's pasts, dig up dirt, or reveal skeletons in the closet UNLESS it can affect your brothers and sisters today (If somebody has HIV, HEPc, herpes, and shares a common cup or works in a dangerous environment with you - OR - if they have a history of child molestation or some other problem that can come into the church.)

But if somebody has a wayward child, was a crook 30 years ago, or a person committed adultery against their spouse 15 years ago (and the matter resolved), etc. etc. digging out skeletons diminishes why Jesus suffered and died on the cross.

Are we free indeed?

We'd be better off if we were all just comfortable admitting our faults and letting some sunlight fall on them.

For example, a couple once freely admitted to me their first child was conceived out of wedlock. That's a lot better than me eventually finding out through the grapevine (or having an eagle eye when it comes to calendars).

A church with a culture of admitting faults is a wonderful places. And sometimes people do need to talk about others who aren't present - there is a way this can happen that is loving and kind, instead of being to tear down.

"Ok, you need to understand this person did this in the past. Now you can know what they are going through now."

vs.

"Let me tell you about how bad this person is."

When I share my "story" with my ministry and close brethren, I tell them about my past sins. This gives me the peace of honesty, and enables them to help me deal with ongoing effects of my sins and my temptations.

Josh wrote: (or having an eagle eye when it comes to calendars).

CSI: MennoNet.

I can just see it. The Next spin-off of the original CSI series.

(For you that don't understand... google it!)

it's just a TV show reference.

Saving my fellow CA's from googling since 2017.

cmbl wrote:
Saving my fellow CA's from googling since 2017.

Not all heros wear capes!

(Sorry... another TV/web reference!)