How to love your neighbour

[PetrChelcicky]

If you love your neighbour that implies that you try understand him as he is - an imperfect human being with his weaknesses which all make him somewhat dangerous to his neighbours. One human may be prone to aggressive impulses. Another human may be nice but sloppy and clumsy - which may be just as damaging!
You accept these weaknesses, which means that you do NOT try to ignore them. You consider them and take them into account. If necessary, you try to protect yourself and your family from possible damages. This is a matter of reasonable caution. (Everyone is entitled to call your caution "fear", if he wants to, but there is nothin wrong with this kind of "fear".)
"Unconditional love" doesn't mean "unconditional trust". If you ignore to see your neighbour as the (potentially dangerous) being he is, with his weaknesses, you denifitely do NOT love him.
Real love can imply avoiding conflicts; it can imply retention/retentiveness/retreat and it can imply voluntary self-segregation.
Anabaptists were historically very good just in these tasks - retreat, self-segregation - and could give good advice and expertise, if they would only see the point.

[francis]

I appreciate this post. Unconditional love =/= unconditional trust is so important. There are many people in my life whom I love deeply but I should not let that love blind me to the damage they can potentially cause. Love doesn't have to go against reason.

[barnhart]

Peter, I've been thinking over your post for a while because I'm not sure how to respond. I agree the scripture does not call us to unconditional trust in anyone except Jesus, but it does call us to unconditional forgiveness. The two are not the same, but they are related and knowing the difference is hard.

[Aurien]

Peter, I've been thinking over your post for a while because I'm not sure how to respond. I agree the scripture does not call us to unconditional trust in anyone except Jesus, but it does call us to unconditional forgiveness. The two are not the same, but they are related and knowing the difference is hard.

Some people on here are probably sick of hearing about sexual abuse by now, but that's the best example I know to try to respond to this. My father sexually abused myself and some of my siblings as well as his developmentally challenged sister. He doesn't seem to understand the hurt his actions caused both to those he abused and to those he didn't abuse but who still suffered the fallout from his sin. He seems to be sorry that he got caught but not really sorry that he committed the abuse. While I can forgive him I wouldn't trust him with access to children or vulnerable adults. It wouldn't be wise or loving to put them in harm's way or to give him easy access to temptation.

[barnhart]

I wouldn't either.

[TruthSeeker]

Peter, I've been thinking over your post for a while because I'm not sure how to respond. I agree the scripture does not call us to unconditional trust in anyone except Jesus, but it does call us to unconditional forgiveness. The two are not the same, but they are related and knowing the difference is hard.

Some people on here are probably sick of hearing about sexual abuse by now, but that's the best example I know to try to respond to this. My father sexually abused myself and some of my siblings as well as his developmentally challenged sister. He doesn't seem to understand the hurt his actions caused both to those he abused and to those he didn't abuse but who still suffered the fallout from his sin. He seems to be sorry that he got caught but not really sorry that he committed the abuse. While I can forgive him I wouldn't trust him with access to children or vulnerable adults. It wouldn't be wise or loving to put them in harm's way or to give him easy access to temptation.

Aurien, I'm so sorry for the abuse you, your sibs, and aunt experienced! Thank you for your genuine care for other victims and dedication to the prevention of future victims. May you have continued grace and strength in your journey!