S. Stutzman claims 67% of Anabaptist women have been sexually abused

[Josh]

Beneath the veneer is mind-boggling levels of all kinds of sexual perversion. Sexual molestation, homosexuality, bestiality, fornication, adultery, patronizing sex related commercial establishments, use of pornography, etc.

What is surreal to me is to listen to people who I know for a fact were part of this perversion deny that it has much of a presence.

This points to the need for:

1. Proper church discipline and excommunication for unrepentant sexual sin. Repentance could mean changing your life such that the circumstances that could lead to a relapse don’t happen.

2. Those who speak the loudest about these issues often turn out to be complicit in covering up these things myself, which is especially disheartening.

3. I still disagree with the 67% figure. I imagine it is the same ratio as the population at large. Nevertheless, if it has a root in a church, it seems fair to question just how much that church is submitting to Jesus and experiencing the Holy Spirit’s guidance.

[Josh]

I don’t agree that he’s “highly respected”. When somebody told me to go to him for counselling, the situation of what he did with me would best be described as spiritual abuse.

He is also not licensed to give counselling and certainly not to do so over the phone with people he hasn’t met.

You went to him for counseling?

Yes. Sent you a PM.

[Wade]

What I am reading seems odd in the light of what I have observed and heard to the effect that Conservative Mennonite groups are fairly careful in terms of standards of propriety as between adult men and women.

But I think that a point of vulnerability, especially with large families, may come with the generally less supervised interaction of teen and pre-teen children. Without that supervision, I suspect that a culture of sexual abuse can arise all on its own and be perpetuated without the presence of any predatory adult.

Beneath the veneer is mind-boggling levels of all kinds of sexual perversion. Sexual molestation, homosexuality, bestiality, fornication, adultery, patronizing sex related commercial establishments, use of pornography, etc.

What is surreal to me is to listen to people who I know for a fact were part of this perversion deny that it has much of a presence.

I am so sorry for those who have gone through these horrible things...

So if this is true where are the men walking out? Because staying to me is supporting it even if one isn't partaking and I'd be surprised if others just stand by?

Your month off turn into a year.

[ragpicker]

Your month off turn into a year.

Yeah, you'd never know that for a long time I was top 10 and even top 5 poster on the old website. I've changed I guess. It's less attractive around these parts for me for other reasons too.

[Heirbyadoption]

Brothers (and sisters), take my opinion as you will, but I am ashamed to read this thread as it stands. I'm not sure which is more disappointing to me here, the offering of this thread for discussion with it's initial implications against the veracity of a specific brother and his ministry (whether you consider it legit or not), or the seemingly outright dismissal of firsthand testimony from Peregrino and Ragpicker and comments to the opposite expressing disbelief or naivete, but most especially the ongoing slandering by way of "speculation" about our brother Steve who made the original quote. I can put you in touch with Steve or his ministry if you can't find him yourself, but the tenor of comments here (intended or otherwise) is unChristian and actually harmful to addressing the actual abuse issue. If you want to know where he gets his numbers, call and ask; but a thread started by someone who considers him an illegitimate counselor is hardly the place to jump on the bandwagon, especially if people are confusing him with Joe Keim (of MAP) to begin with. I suggest this post be scrapped and the discussion re-begun if necessary in hopes of having an open, honest, and perhaps effective discussion about the issue of abuse among Anabaptists, and yes, even statistics if that would help. But I would be ashamed to have an unbeliever read how we speak of our brothers in this thread - its creation may have been sincere, but it is not expedient. Just my two cents.

[Karstan78]

I do think there’s validity to the high number, especially when you consider that many perpetrators are protected and victims are told to forgive. The “ghost rapes” of Bolivia also come to mind, that alone would boost the percentage. In general society most forms of abuse are underreported, why would Anabaptists be any different?

[ragpicker]

In the conservative Mennonite church I grew up in, taking two grades lower, and 2 higher than me, for a total of 5 grades. Every single girl was sexually molested in some manner. Some of the boys were. All the boys engaged in sexual perversion of some for or another. None of this proves anything, but there are people who insist such things ere rare among that age group. I have run into similar dynamics on numerous occasions. So pardon me if such claims of relative rarity ring a bit hollow to me.

But regardless, I wonder if the OP was more about ax grinding than a sincere discussion of the matter.

[Wade]

I do think there’s validity to the high number, especially when you consider that many perpetrators are protected and victims are told to forgive. The “ghost rapes” of Bolivia also come to mind, that alone would boost the percentage. In general society most forms of abuse are underreported, why would Anabaptists be any different?

Because they fear God. Or at least I used to think that. Thank God I was raised atheist by parents who would never tolerate such and did seperate us from any wacko relatives or others and kept me from abuse. I expect more from Christians with at least some things and this being one of them.

[Karstan78]

I do think there’s validity to the high number, especially when you consider that many perpetrators are protected and victims are told to forgive. The “ghost rapes” of Bolivia also come to mind, that alone would boost the percentage. In general society most forms of abuse are underreported, why would Anabaptists be any different?

Because they fear God. Or at least I used to think that. Thank God I was raised atheist by parents who would never tolerate such and did seperate us from any wacko relatives or others and kept me from abuse. I expect more from Christians with at least some things and this being one of them.

I also think manmade reasons are behind a chunk of it.
If for an example the family patriarch is behind the abuse, how can the wife leave him knowing she can’t remarry? Who would provide financially? It is easier to make sure the children are not left alone with him than think about repercussions.
2, or if a girl has been abused and it’s made public, it could jeopardise any future marriage opportunities because in some minds she is “damaged”
3, a girl feels that she was at fault for the abuse.
4, sibling abuse, parents would rather turn a blind eye than openly admit to this.
5, the perpetrator is a well respected member of the community and you and your family will be labelled as causing strife.

These are all points I have witnessed through one member or another, however due to the severity of discipline and excommunication in AC churches, it is a lot riskier for abusers as there is no forgiveness or covering. A study has suggested in non Anabaptist society 90% of abusers are religious and can have anywhere between 12-1000+ victims. So if they are abusing one person, they more than likely have several other victims.

[Bootstrap]

Peregrino, RagPicker, I'd like to thank you for sharing your experiences. That took courage.